My ex and I was dating for a year and a half when he asked me to marry him. I said yes thinking things are gonna be great for us but,at the same time thinking my feelings for him wasn't as strong as his was for me. Then I found out I was pregnant. We started fighting alot and I was starting the fights because I did not want to have a baby with him. At the time in my mind I really did'nt have strong feelings for him and did'nt think our relationship was going to last so I did not want to bring a child into it. Our relationship was ok at the beginning. He treated me great, I was just being cautious because I was hurt once. Anyway, again we started fighting. I started hanging out with my ex boyfriend thinking he would get mad and leave so I would'nt have to have the baby. So our fights got worst. I told him I did'nt want to be with him anymore and he immediately accused me of sleeping with my ex. Which I wasn't. So he moved out because of the fighting but constantly stalked me because I continued to hang out with my ex. He didn't want me to have an abortion and did everything in his power to get me back but I didn't go back. I kept the baby. He was there for some of my dr visits. Sometimes we was cool and at other times I continued to push him away. So,he never moved back in but he was there when the baby was born. Then we figured for the sake of the baby we could work it out. He didn't want to. He didn't come see the baby often but bought the things she needed. we're still fighting like crazy now I'm dating other people and so is he. During all those months my feelings were almost gone. Now he's telling me he wants me back and still loves me. I tell him over and over he blew his chances because when the baby was born I tried to work it out but he wanted to go party.I think about him alot and don't know if I should give him another chance or not. I do care for him but think about how he wasn't there for the baby and I and the things he said and done.What should I do? Please help.
Responses to this article:
--- Monday, June 28, 2004 -
Answer by: Enigma
Denise,
You can start by taking responsibility for YOUR own choices and decisions...
I'm sorry, but for real, you've said that you didn't think the relationship was good, you didn't think it was going anywhere and you didn't want to have a child with him... so why Denise didn't you protect yourself and not become pregnant to begin with?
Regardless, the baby is here now...
Listen, you've caused at least 50% of your own misery here... you said yourself that were trying to piss this guy off and make him feel insecure about the relationship... so you accomplished your goal there, now you seem to be angry that he did the things he's done...
Bottom line is this... regardless if you get back together with this guy or not... you have a child. So you BOTH need to do the right thins for her... it isn't just about you or him anymore.
LOVE QUESTIONS & ANSWERS: Love Q & A : Get your love & relationship questions answered - NEW!! Love Q&A Forum | Old Love Q&A Love Pros : Professional Help with love's challenges & relationships