My sister is 13-Years-Old. She looks and acts older but she is only 13. Most of her friends are a lot older than she is. I have always looked out for her and now she and one of my friends who is 19 are falling for each other. Yes, he is six years older than her. You see, he is a good friend and she is my sister. He is a good christian guy and I know he wouldn't try anything stupid with her. But this still has me wondering. Is this morally right? Any advice would be very appreciated.
Responses to this article:
--- Wednesday, July 7, 2004 -
Answer by: a 13 year old
well i am a 13 year old 2 and i now have a 19 year old boy-friend i love him and he would never do something i shoulden't now at 13 he respects me and has neber asked me 2 have sex with him.i think age is just a number and if they love each other well let them go out but jus u know make sure 2 tell her not 2 do something stupid. If she is mature and smart and you know that this guy woulden't try anything stupid with your sister well let them go out.
--- Wednesday, June 30, 2004 -
Answer by: Ashley
Kyle,
Age is just a number. My grandpa is 12 years older than my grandma and my boyfriend is 6 years older than me. (I'm 15 and he's 21.) If they're in love, there's nothing you can do anyway.
--- Wednesday, June 30, 2004 -
Answer by:
I'm 13 and I don't get how people can think that thirteen year olds are just little kids. I think that you can feel love at any age. I don't know how old you guys are, but you must have forgot what it was like to be 13. I have friends that are 18 and 19 as well as my own age. But come on, if they are in love, then let them be together. Besides, let them learn from there mistakes. I don't know about everyone else, but I think you should get your friend and sister in on this site and let them post what they think about the subject. Now I will get back to playing with my Barbie dolls.
--- Tuesday, June 29, 2004 -
Answer by: Enigma
Sorry, got to totally disagree with "Me" and "Kelly"
Kelly, thats great that it worked out for you and your husband however you were still a little girl and he was an adult when the two of you met... while the age difference isn't an issue now, in my opinion it was a huge issue at the time you initially met him.
I have a two little girls, they are 3 and 6 and there is NO WAY IN HELL I would allow this to happen period.
Regardless if over a century ago it wasn't uncommon... it also wasn't and isn't uncommon for some people to marry off thier children for money in some cultures or for children to quit school to help the family financially, however regardless if it was common or not, it doens't mean it was or is right or was or is the best possible thing for the child... I use the word CHILD because at age 13 that is exactly what you are, a child.
ME, it also doesn't make any difference how mature this 13 year old little girl is, she is STILL a little girl. He is still a 19 year old Man and you are going to be very hard pressed to convince me that sex wouldn't be on his mind here... as far as i'm concerned 13 is to young to be getting involved intimatly.
I've known and heard from so many kids who thought at age 13 or 15 they were all ready to be an adult and have babies and get married... only to discover at age 31 or sooner they had a lot of regret and wish they had enjoyed being a kid...
You are both entitled to your opinion as I am to mine... but statistically speaking... forever kind of love in these situations isn't real good.
--- Tuesday, June 29, 2004 -
Answer by: Kelly
I would consider this to be intirely wrong or inmoral. When I was 13 I fell for a guy that was 22. Now we are happily married. I am now 25 and he is 34. It doesn't really seem like a big deal now does it? He really helped me out. Before I met him, I did drank, smoked and did various drugs. That was before I was 13. When I met him, he wasn't into any of that and he got me out of it. Your friend might be a positive influence on your sister as well. We used to hang out together and couldn't stand to be apart.
We did everything together except for sex. We didn't have sex until we got married. I wouldn't change anything that happened between us for the world. I was in love and I still am. Just because your sister is 13, doesn't mean she is incapable of love.
Basically what I am saying, if you trust your friend, let him and your sister find out if they are in love. Because only they know for sure.
Here's some food for thought. A little over a century ago, it was very common for people to even get married at age 13. I'm not suggesting that, but it sure does make your sister and friend seem a lot better though.
--- Tuesday, June 29, 2004 - Depends
Answer by: Me
I don't totally disagree with the below statements however I know that love goes through many stages and it could very well be that he'll or she'll realize it soon. But if they're both mature and reasonable then why should other people stop people from loving each other?
--- Tuesday, June 29, 2004 -
Answer by: Dr.Philgood
Okay, this is a giant leap in age. She's 13 and he's 19. At first that looks like a giant leap in age. But in about 5 years it won't be that big of a deal at all. But for now, I'd advise that you get with your friend and sister and talk some since into them. They are obviously infatuated with each other and they probably haven't thought about what other people have thought. You know, when my sister was 14 she got pregnant by a 21 year old. They ended up getting married and they are now very happy together. But that is them. She does talk about how when wishes that she didn't grow up so fast but there isn't a thing to do about it. Just try to talk your friend to just be friends with your sister. If they are still good friends when she is 18 and still have the same feelings, then let them do what they want, but now you need to be the big brother and keep her safe.
--- Tuesday, June 29, 2004 -
Answer by: Enigma
Kyle,
Damn! I knew when I saw the title of your article this wasn't going to be good...
Listen, I don't care if he is a good christian or a good friend... he is WAY TO OLD for your little sister period.
A lot of little girls look older than they are and try to be older than they are, however they are STILL little girls...
It seems that your little sister is trying to grow up to fast... hanging out with people who are older than herself and now trying to date a guy who is too old for her as well...
She is barely a teenager... he is a LEGAL ADULT... nope sorry, this isn't okay for a lot of reasons...
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