I'm 16, I'll be a Junior, and I've never had a boyfriend. Usually the guys I like will be at least my age, usually a year or so older. I'm a love baseball, so if the guy plays it or is a big fan, I like them even more.
The problem I'm having right now is with some younger guys. I have a younger brother who just turned 14, and will be in 8th grade. He made this special baseball team and they played in a tournament in Florida. I went along with my Dad and older brother. I guess I kinda have feeling for one of the guys. I don't really want to have these feelings. I've always 'told' myself that I wanted a guy my age or a little older, so I don't really know what to do with my feelings.
I know that in real life, there are some couples where the women is older. But I feel mostly right now, being I'm 16 and a junior in highschool, that this isn't really right. I'm about 2.5 years older than him, but I'll be a senior when he is a freshman. I'll call him Jack. Anyways, Jack was the only guy from the team that would really talk to me. I know he's not the only one to notice me. I have three brothers and am used to hanging with guys.
Anywyas, we had to wait in the lobby of the hotel for quite a while till it was time to leave. The baseball team was kinda hanging out together, but Jack was over in the chair next to me, and we were just talking.
He's a really nice guy, and already has matured physically. But I feel totally wrong even thinking of having feelings for him. Is what I'm feeling really wrong? What should I do? What could I do? I'm really confused.
Responses to this article:
--- Wednesday, August 18, 2004 -
Answer by: Sam
Age ain't nothin' but a number... as long as we're talking legal here. :-)
A two years difference is no big deal... but as Enigma points out -- you're in high school, he's in middle school -- and the maturity differences can be an issue. Females are much more mature than males in the developing stages -- by a few years or so.
However he as an individual could be more mature than most guys his age. If you really like him, and he likes you -- I don't see a real problem here. Follow your heart.
--- Wednesday, August 18, 2004 -
Answer by: Enigma
B,
Well, first it is true that women and men alike often date, marry,or get involved with younger individuals and while there isn't anything really wrong with that there are also times when it is inappropriate.
Obviously this can become an issue if the circumstance is that an ADULT is trying to hook up with a MINOR, this isn't okay for a lot of reasons, not to mention it's illegal.
However what you're talking about involves a guy who is 14 years old to your 16 years... as long as you and he are both okay with this AND both parents of the two of you are okay with this, I don't really see that it should be an issue regarding the age difference...
However once again... you need to keep in mind that while he may be physically mature that doesn't mean he is as emotionally or mentally as mature as you are. You are in high school, he is in junior high. You either have or are about to get your drivers license, he has a few years to go on that. You may be looking for a "relationship" while he may still be really into just his friends and hanging out...
There are a lot of variables here.
You've said you feel it is wrong for you to have feelings for him... so with that said, maybe you've already answered your own question. If it really doesn't seem right to you, and it doesn't feel right to you... maybe you need to take a step back and just remain friends with Jack... eventually you will be closer in circumstance(s) and maybe can develop something at another time.
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