First of all i would like to thank you for replying me and showing me the right way but i have some doubts i hope you all will help me... you all are absolutely right that he is not interested in me.
I tried to drag myself away from him but we are in the same class and unfortunately in the same project so you only tell how can i ruin my feelings when we are so close.
Actually we were simple friends and then became intimate friends after that only i got emotionally attached and then i asked him his views regarding me. He said we were moving around but he wants to end up by being just a friend.
Now you tell me , was mine asking of question was wrong at that stage or was my development of feelings was something unfair?
Today he asked what i am doing in the evening . I replied nothing. So he said lets move out .Though mine mind was not allowing me to do so but i could not resist and went out with him , believe me were not simple friend.
Please guide me to come out of this situation as i dont want to move around with a guy who can never be mine or just wait for him to introduce with his new GF.But i really feel for him .I haven't feel in this way ever before not with my ex BF.
I really need your guidance ..You know after coming back i wept because i knew that he can't be mine. I dont want to ruin my life ..You know i am dieing each and every second .Please help me in coming out, I know i will not get good guy like him but its ok with me because i think i am the biggest curse in this world who does not deserve something good.I just want to see him happy if he is happy without its ok ...
But tell me one thing ,when a guy can develop a feeling in a girl when initially she dont fel for him then why a girl can't do the same thing? Now you tell how can i
Do reply me ..I am in vain Thanks Nancy
Responses to this article:
--- Tuesday, August 24, 2004 -
Answer by: Sam
Nancy,
I understand how my first reply to you was short... but the only other advice I have for you is basically what my friend Enigma has told you -- you have to take control here.
It is obvious that you're way into this guy, perhaps even a little obsessive judging by the amount of posts you've left -- and you need to sit back for a moment and think rationally here. I know you're panicking because you're blinded by your feelings and you want so much from this guy, but this guy sounds like an all around jackass who is using you -- as Enigma says, that is NOT ok and that is definitely no friend!
My observation here is that you're addicted to this man. That is typical of unheathy relationships. You want so much and he is not giving into you nor giving you what you want, however you give into HIM and let him use you -- denying yourself of your own dignity and wants... that is not love, Nancy.
Bottom line -- stop sleeping with him or you will get hurt really, really bad. Get out and meet other people and have fun -- you have a life outside of HIM, ok? He is not a friend to you nor does he care about you. That's hard to tell you but if he was worth your affections, Nancy -- he would not treat you this way. Your really deserve better than this clown.
--- Monday, August 23, 2004 -
Answer by: Willow
wow girl. i'm here for you. be strong in everything and in all you do. don't give up whatever. keep a positive attitude on this ok.
--- Monday, August 23, 2004 -
Answer by: Enigma
Nancy,
Well i'm a little lost as to whats happened exactly... however with what I can make of things....
First of all, as far as i'm concerned when you've become intimate with someone, then it is your right to ask them questions period.
Secondly, if this guy is telling you that ultimatley he only wants to be your friend... then you need to tell him okay, thats fine but STOP being intimate with him and explain it to him this way "I don't have sex with my friends" period end of story.
If he wants a friend with benefits for him, then let him look elsewhere Nancy... you will only be more hurt in the end if you allow this to continue.
I know you're hurting right now, but trust me that this guy isn't "good" or "great" he is using you, knowing straight up you care for him, that isn't okay... in fact Nancy that isn't even being a friend to you... because a true friend would have more care,and concern for your feelings.
You deserve someone that treats you well Nancy, so stop beating yourself up here and allowing this idiot to hurt your feelings or make you feel like he is the best you can do, thats just B.S and he knows it.
LOVE QUESTIONS & ANSWERS: Love Q & A : Get your love & relationship questions answered - NEW!! Love Q&A Forum | Old Love Q&A Love Pros : Professional Help with love's challenges & relationships