I've been with this guy 9 months. We both fell hard for eachother. During the summer I broke up with him b/c he wasn't treating me right. He showed some positive changes almost a month later and we have been going strong ever since. He went back to his work and is working with a girl he cheated on his last girlfriend with. At first I had no problem with it, he lied and told me he never talked to her. Then one day I caught him lying. The girl isn't the problem. It is the lying. (there are other things too) Because of that I broke up with him and we took time apart. We both love eachother so much and I want to be with him, he claims he wants to be with me too but he just needs time. He says when he is with me he loves it, but when he isnt with me it doesnt bug him. How does he want to be with me if he thinks that? And when I am not with him he is so rude to me. He shuts me off like it is nothing. I try so hard and it is getting me no where. I am so crazy over him and when I talk to him and for some reason he always makes me cry. It's like he likes being a dick to me.Then he freaks out on me and tells me he doesnt need my *@#$. Any other time we fought and I didn't cry he thought I didn't care. So this time I do and he gets mad. Does anyone know how to help this situation???
Responses to this article:
--- Wednesday, September 29, 2004 -
Answer by: Emma
Baby - you are more than welcome!
Sometimes it takes people to read the situation from the 'outside', ya know? Often you can't see the wood for the tree when you're in the midst of things & your emotions are all over the place. You feel torn & that's never the best climate for making the right decision & going in the right direction...
I really am glad you've decided to move on with your life. Believe me, it won't be long before you realise just how badly he treated you. I always think that you're stronger than you give yourself credit for & you WILL come through this so much stronger...
Beware though, this jerk will, no doubt, realise what a great girl he's lost & when he does, just you make sure you keep that door firmly closed - no matter what yarn he spins you...
A decent guy'll come along soon, a guy who treats you respect & gives you the love you deserve AND who is worthy of your time & effort :)
Take care & best of luck! ~Emma~
--- Tuesday, September 28, 2004 - what other then confused.....
Answer by: babygirl20
Thank you for all your help everyone. No matter who I talk to about this situation they all have the same response. "This guy is a loser and he doesn't deserve you." Last nite I finally decided to stop sulking about it and I didn't answer his phone calls or his msg's on the computer. And he kept trying and trying to get in touch with me. Where as before he got SO mad when I tried contacting him. I guess you live and learn right. Part of me wants to go back to him, but after reading what you guys wrote a lot more things are starting to make sense. Thanks very much!! And to top everything off, I sent him a poem I wrote for him and he deleted it and said "any 4 year old can find a poem off the net and send it to someone." So I wrote back saying "Well this 4 year old wrote it for you." And he was like "Oh well, I deleted it." Talk about a jerk eh!!!!!!!!!!
--- Tuesday, September 28, 2004 -
Answer by: Emma
Yep, you can do much better...
Ya know, if you're treated badly by someone for long enough you begin to accept it as "The Norm", you forget what being in a loving relationship is all about & are blind to being treated like a piece of dirt...
Come on! Move on, you've tried, tried & tried again but at some point down the line you have to face up to things. Sure, you might care a lot for him but the simple fact is - he doesn't feel the same. He seems completely ignorant to your feelings & likes to play games...
Take some time out at least, PROPER time out - long enough for him to notice you're gone & long enough for you to enjoy some time being single. Why not go on a few dates, sample what's on offer... THEN when he's badgering you enough - come back (not too eagerly) to review the situation. More like than not you'll regret having wasted so much time on an A-grade loser...
Laters @:-)
--- Tuesday, September 28, 2004 -
Answer by: Sam
This is a relationship not worth pursuing. It has "failure" written all over it.
This guy is not someone you want to be with. He has already proven to you that he is a liar, so you can't trust him, and he treats you terribly. Isn't that reason enough to break up with the guy for good?
This guy is a sis bag. You can do much better.
--- Monday, September 27, 2004 -
Answer by: Enigma
The best way to help yourself here is to kick his sorry butt to the side, and move on.
Sorry girl, but for real... what kind of guy gets something out of hurting his supposed girlfriend and making her cry? That is just sick and it's wrong... he obviously feels a lot of power in making you cry over his stupid ass, and trust me he isn't worth it.
What are you crazy about? He lies to you, he makes you cry, he's rude to you and tells you he doesn't really care if your with him or not... what is there to love in that?
Blah!
You deserve better than this crap. Don't contact his butt anymore... and IF he wonders IF you care... well let him sit and burn in it. What a jerk!
LOVE QUESTIONS & ANSWERS: Love Q & A : Get your love & relationship questions answered - NEW!! Love Q&A Forum | Old Love Q&A Love Pros : Professional Help with love's challenges & relationships
