Title: contination to the nun story

By:

I had previously posted about me being in love with a girl who desires to become a nun(her name is josie). I respect her decision, and I would be happy just to have her there as my friend. Well, ever since she told me that she wanted to be a nun, we told eachother everything. I told her everything about myself, my past love experiences and such, and the hearbreak that I had been through. She told me a lot about herself as well; she is usually modest with everyone else.

Well, her decision to be a nun had only been made during this summer. she always dreamt of having a true love, until she gained faith in God when she went to Argentina. Her family there was so much more different than here. Well, of course I had told her that I had feelings for her, and that they were strong, but that I wouldnt do anyhting to get in her way.

She met her last love in Argentina as well, but that had to end becuase she had to return. She then said to me, "My last love. It's not hard to let go any more. All the holes have vanished because I've finaly realized I've never been alone. I want to be you friend Sean, I really do like you. But you won't see the girl I used to be anymore."

Well, our friendship grew stronger from then on, we spent lunch together nearly everyday, and we talked a lot and shared a lot together. We both had read Les Miserables, which we both love. so we would talk about that among other things.

Well, homecoming came along, and I asked her if it would be awkard if I asked her out to the dance. she giggled and said she wasnt into those things, and tht she had only gone to one once as a joke. Of course, I only intended on asking her out as a friend. but we never went anyway.

I spoke to the friend of mine that had told me that josie had a crush on me. I talked to her again, asking what it was that they talked about and if she really did say she was interested in me. I had to let my friend know what was going on, that josie wanted to become a nun. Even though Josie told me to keep it a secret. my friend said that she did tell her that, and I can for sure trust my friend to be telling the truth. But either way, I would be happy with just having josie as my friend.


Well, it came to a point where josie would go to her math class for lunch everday to do her homework, since she wouldnt do it at home. I would go in with her, and just sit there, but sometimes I would become a distraction to her.
i think there were times where she was begining to get annoyed, but she always seemed to enjoy my company.

then one day, she was locked outside of her classroom, so she couldnt do her hw, i ran into her, and we started chatting a bit. a friend of hers came by, and they began talking, and the she asked me, " so , do u 2 always eat lunch together?"
josie replied yes, and i asked her friend,"why, is there anything wrong with that?" The way she had asked if we ate togehter everyday bugged me, then she was like "oh no, i didnt mean it like in that way."

well, the next day we were gonna have a day off, so on our way to our 6th period class, i asked her wat she was gonna do the next day, she merely said, "stuff", i asked her if we could hang out, but she said she couldnt, then i started saying tht i would like to hang out sometime after school, but she said she coudlnt. "could we ever??" "probably not," was her reply. She then said to me, "i dont even know why you like to eat lunch with me, im so boring." i said to her, "I dont think ur boring, " and she just laughed, a good laugh sorta like saying, "who are u kidding, yes i am."

well, just last week, she told me that she was going to have to take another vow of silence, (she had taken one in the beginning of the school year) She said it was to last a month.
that was also the last day we spent lunch together.

From then on things began to get awkard. I feel she is trying to distance herself from me now even as a friend. We would usually walk to our last class togheter, and then split up, but this time Josie just took off to another direction without saying bye. When we were first getting to know eachother, she used to give me a bright smile when we passed by eachother in the halls. I could sorta sense her happiness through it. Now her smiles have become awkward towards me, i dont know. It appears to be like a look of discomfort.

we even used to work together on our assignments, and like today, she completely ignored me; i dont even think she is being true to her vow of silence. I mean she did tell me that she was going to say little things as to not make it seem so awkward. But she goes off talking as though she had never taken the vow, and seems to stay silent with me.


I feel as though Im losing her as a friend now. I dont know why. Right now, she is my only motivation. Without her im lost. any ideas on why she might be acting this way towards me?? Are there any suggestions yo may have so I can clear all this and continue our friendship like it used to be??
thank you.

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Monday, November 22, 2004 -
Answer by: sam

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Monday, November 22, 2004 - hard question
Answer by: beebee