I am currently married for 10 years, no kids and am very in love with my wife. I have had a friendship with another girl for 4 years and recently have been getting closer at an alarming rate. My wife knows about our friendship but I hide a lot from her about the relationship. I have met her husband and he knows about our friendship also. The last thing I want to do is screw up both our marriages so I keep my distance. Physically we have hugged each other and have gone no further. I have a great marriage but hers is slightly faltering and there has been a lot of other difficulties throughout the past 2 months with her life that I have been there as a shoulder to cry on for. I relate well to her because her profession is closely related to my wife's, in fact she reminds me a lot of my wife in many ways.
The last 2 months have been an emotional roller coaster with the different things that have happened in her life. It affected me emotionally because I can't fix everything that is happening in her life and I can't be there for her when she really needs someone to help where others in her life won't or can't help. Two weeks ago she was in the hospital and I thought she was going to die. It was driving me crazy to not know what was going on at the time all the time and I finally broke down emotionally. She is currently better but could get worse again. I can't break down again emotionally so I have distanced myself and it is killing me not knowing how she is doing all of the time.
I have been asking myself why I feel this way about her and wonder if I love her just as much as I do my wife. I have cried for her, I would die for her; I would do anything for her but leave my wife or cheat on my wife with her. And I can't stop thinking about her for the past two months. Can I love them both?
Responses to this article:
--- Thursday, November 25, 2004 -
Answer by: beebee
u need 2 think of your consequences. how is this going to affect your life after you have an affair? i think it would be best if you stop talking to the other woman because if your having these thoughts . something could lead to another and then u would probaly have guilt about it for a long time until your wife found out. and i kno she would be very very hurt.
--- Monday, November 15, 2004 -
Answer by: guy
No man who has ever cheated on his wife has ever been happy that they did it. Just continue to be a good friend to the other girl and just be that. Theres a big difference between a friendship and an affair.
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