I recently just resumed 'friends only' status with my boyfriend.
It's so sad... and here's what happened.
We were so in love with each other, we were even thinking about our future together. Days were so colourful... until that very day.
He went on an overseas trip, and while he was away, he did call back and sent me flowers on my birthday. Then finally he returned. But that was when the bad news broke out.
When we met up after he returned, I could sense that he was very deep in thoughts always; with a tinge of misery in his looks. I asked him if he was alright, he said 'ya'. But I could tell for sure, something was wrong when he suddenly didn't hold my hand.
Then I made him talked about it. He told me he is feeling very miserable about how he is feeling. He said he suddenly felt very different about the two of us. I asked him why, he says he doesn't know as well. When he was abroad, he just suddenly didn't feel or think anything/anyway about me.
Then I told him, perhaps he had really lost the love he used to have for me. But he told me he is not sure if he has really lost it. He assured that even if it's really lost, it's not to anyone. He didnt really want a breakup, but he felt it was very unfair to me in a way. So he very sadly asked for me to be his friend.
So now, I am only and always wondering... if he had really lost a love so strong. Was he just temporarily confused, or can it really be lost?
Responses to this article:
--- Tuesday, January 25, 2005 - To sam
Answer by: Haiz
Hey Sam,
thanks so much for your reply. I really needed someone, with a clearer mind than me, to 'evaluate' the whole matter.
Anyway, jus to add on... before he left for his trip, he was so upset coz we couldnt see each other for nearly a month. We went out almost every other day before he left for his trip, and he told me he'll be missing me so badly.
Now, thinking back, i wondered if all that was for nothing. It's like... I cant understand how could you loved someone so much, and then overnight, just lose that kinda feeling. It's been so hard for me, everytime i recall about the things he did or said before...and then i link it to now... it's jus so...sad.
Oh well, guess it's all up to me to really forget the past; it can really only stop my heart from mending. But it's just so tough...
I really thank you for responding to this post. (oh ya, by the way, you're so true, after I read your post, I teared so much just like that, Man... it hurts)
--- Sunday, January 23, 2005 -
Answer by: sam
In your situation, Haiz (and bear yourself here because this may be hard for you to take, it is hard enough for me to type) -- I'm willing to bet more is going on than you know. Think about it. If things were so hunky-dory as you say they were before he left, three possibilities could be going on here, maybe all of the above. One, he either was thinking about breaking up with you before he left, two, he realized on his trip he wanted freedom and not to be tied down during this time, or three, he met someone else on his trip.
Either way, all you can do now is let him go. It will take time... but being his "friend" for now after he broke up with you is just not realistic -- give yourself time to get over him, and the relationship.
Don't let this get you down. While it's hard to hear -- there's a better, more fulfilling relationship out there for you just around the corner. Some relationships just aren't meant to be. Keep your chin up.
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