Okay, I'm just looking for advice on a situation that I'm just not sure how to handle... Alright, basically my high school had a school dance on Saturday night, and it was a formal, so you guys would ask girls as dates and stuff. I brought a girl that I have a huge crush on, but I'm not sure how she feels about me. Well anyways, I was pretty excited about the night because I thought it would be a good way for us to sort off hit it off and I was hoping that she would have a really good time with me. Yet every time we would go out on the floor to dance, we would dance for maybe about 1 song, and then she would get pulled over by one of her friends to go do whatever girls do when that happens, and she would say "I'll be right back." The first few times this happened I was alright, even though I would lose track of her when she went off, but then after about 10-15 minutes I would eventually find her again somewhere on the dance floor. However, this was a recurring event throughout the night. Everytime we danced, she ended up having to go somewhere else with her friends, although every time she left she would be like "I'm really sorry, I'll be right back!" But every time she would get distracted or something and I would have to track her down. Eventually I grew sick of this, and I didn't want to maker her feel awkward or anything by following her around all the time when maybe she just didn't want to be around me. I was pretty upset about this event that night, although when I dropped her off at her car which was at a friend's house she was very grateful that I had taken her to the dance, and when I told her that she had looked great that night she was also thankful, even though she isn't the type of person that would tell you that she had had a bad time or anything. But yeah, I was still bummin about it and wondering why she acted that way since I'm not ugly or mean or anything, and that since I was nice enough to ask her to the dance in the first place, the least she could do would be to spend a little time with me at the dance. However, a friend of mine the next day asked her online how things went with me, and she told him that she didn't get to see me that much, and he said he thought she almost seemed disappointed and that she "missed" me. This really has put me in a tough position...first of all, I was upset at the way she had acted, but it seems that she is upset at me too or something. But then again, my friend said he wasn't sure exactly how she felt, that she only SEEMED disappointed, since its really hard to tell like the tone and everything of a conversation online. Basically I'm wondering, what the hell do I do?? I feel awful if that's the way she feels, because that was not my intention whatsoever, but then again, I felt pretty terrible myself due to her actions, which may have been unintentional as well. I was thinking of talking to her about it, but if my friend was mistaken on interpreting what she said to him, I don't want to apologize to her and then have her think of me as some sap with crazy roller-coaster emotions, since I still really would like to go out with her at some point. What should I do to fix this situation, or is there nothing I can do really? I would really appreciate all responses, and if I can remember any other important details I will post them on the same page again. Thanks for any help.
Responses to this article:
--- Thursday, February 3, 2005 -
Answer by: Emma
Quit making excuses for her behaviour.
I agree with Sam, there are numerous ladies out there who'd be right for you who would treat you with respect. Remember, you must also treat yourself with this respect... raise your standards, & like Sam advises, be a little more vocal when someone takes it in their head to use you as a doormat.
This way, you won't ever be "invisible", not just in romantic relationships but, generally, in life. You can do a lot better.
Best of luck!
--- Monday, January 31, 2005 -
Answer by: sam
Forget her, man, there are better girls out there. She is a rude, classless girl without the decency to spend time with you at the dance YOU took her to. She should learn to have some manners. If I were you, I'd be vocal about how disappointed YOU were about HER behavior -- and move on to a nicer girl.
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