ok well me and my bf are both 18 yet every time he stays round my parents make him sleep downstairs they won't even allow him 2 sleep on the floor in my room... ok i can understand where there coming from a little bit but heres the problem its like they don't trust me.... i would never do anything to break there trust and especially do anything under their roof when they don't want me to. but the thing is I was meant to go on holiday to spain @ easter time with my parents, as they have their own apartment the accomodation is free so my dad asked if I wuld like to bring a m8 along and I asked what about my bf and I was soo suprised when they said yes, you see the apartment only has 2 bedroom one double and one twin so I thought that it would b alright.. anyway I didn't think there was anywhere else he could sleep until my mum came out with.. he'll have to sleep on the tiny sofa bed... bearing in mind the living room space is so small you take 3 steps then you've walked the whole or the room! She doesn't trust me at all! im not stupid enough to do anything while their in the next room... i'm going mad! my bf won't even stay round my house anymore.. because we live so far away from each other we usually go somewhere nearer to one of us and then stay over that persons house as the person wouldn't have to travel far late @ nite... but im wasting all my money going up to see him... its just soo rubbish! he doesn't care about same beds but he says that he want's to spend time with me and that he doesn't want to b stuck downstairs on his own which I can fully understand! all i want is my mum to trust me and to give us a break!
Responses to this article:
--- Friday, March 11, 2005 -
Answer by: greenfairy
klagesgal I didn't say the same bed jus the same room... its not that I can't respect their wishes its jus I think they should give me a chance. my bro is 20 n his gf is 19 and even she has to sleep downstairs everytime she stays ova to!
--- Thursday, March 10, 2005 -
Answer by: Emma
Hmmmm... I can DEFINITELY understand your frustration over your parents not trusting you.
At 18, you are an adult & I, personally, know of previous (yes, I don't see them any longer) friends who had boyfriends sleep WITH them in their parent's homes when they were a couple of years YOUNGER than you are now & those people could never be trusted NOT to act immorally!
I guess morality's going down the pan nowadays, in the UK it certainly has... though every young person deserves to be treated with respect. They should never be tarnished by how others choose to live their lives.
I'd also like to say how it's a pity your parents don't know you well enough to trust you. You sound mature & level headed; did anything happen in the past to make them act this way now or do they just have this "perception" of how the younger generation is bound to act?
All that you can do at this point is to carry on the way you are. If you're spending a lot of cash on travelling, is there any chance you could rent a place of your own? Get a job to fund your plans? That way, you could live your life without these constraints.
As you are, you're under your parent's roof & under their rules so all you can do is grit your teeth & bear it until you can get your own place / move away for Uni... be mature about it no matter how bad it gets, don't give them reason to label you immature.
It's tough though when people "assume" that because you have a boyfriend & you're young that you're automatically going to be planning on sleeping with him. Mature, meaningful relationships without the need for intimacy are possible with the right person, no matter if you're 18 or 80, it don't matter one iota :-)
Keep your chin up & enjoy the time you do spend with your guy. Make the most of it & start making plans!
--- Thursday, March 10, 2005 -
Answer by: klagesgal
You're lucky that your parents let him stay the night. Let alone downstairs. Count your stars lucky girl. Most normal parents don't let their kids bf/gf's sleep in the same room. Your parents obviously care alot about you to be doing that. When you get older you'll really appreciate and understand why they did that.\ I suggest if you can't respect their wishes get your own Apt. Because in reality, if you think at 18 you're old enough to be sharing a bed with your bf then you should be old enough to get your own place.
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