My ex-boyfriend and I were together for 4 ½ years and I really do love him. We have been through so much since the beginning and we some how made it thru. But for the last year now I found myself to be falling out of love him, things were just not the same and he don’t understand what I want and don’t really try to figure it out. I told him that I was unhappy about 8 months ago and he just ignored me and acted as if he didn’t hear what I had to say. When I question him about it he tells me that he didn’t want to believe it because he don’t know what to do. I told him the areas that we need to work on but I guess he might try to change his ways. We have been broken up for 8 months and for him this is the hardest thing for him (so he say). I really want us to work out because I love him with all my heart and he really is a good person. Now on the other hand I’ve been seeing an old high school sweetheart for about 5 months now, we live 5 hours away from each other so our relationship is basically over the phone and by email. I’ve made visits to see him twice and we had such a lovely time, I like being with him and he knows how to treat a lady. All my friends tell me that I should leave my boyfriend to be with him but for some reason I don’t think that would he a good idea. He’s a really great guy but there’s something about him that I feel I can’t trust, I was suppose to take a trip to visit him at the end of this month, but sadly I had a cancel because I had a death in family… instead of him being there for me as far as someone to talk to he’s now avoiding me because he’s upset about me canceling my visit with him. I’m really upset about that because we are adults and I didn’t think that he would react like that. Last month he lost his aunt and I made sure I called him and checked up on him to make sure he was ok… I even sat on the phone with him for 2 hours after her funeral because he was so shaken up about it. I want to just call him and tell him that this relationship is over but then I really enjoy conversation and time that I’ve spent with him. I was up all night thinking about my cousin (the relative lost) wishing there was someone that I could talk to, but he was no where to be found and I can’t call my ex because he’s mad at me and really wont be able to comfort me the way I need him to because of the way he is feeling right now. Should I break it off with this guy, or should I just back off and give him a little space I don’t know what to do because I’m stuck in a bad situation… I still love my ex and for some reason I want to try to make it work with him, but then I see my self falling in love with my old friend and I want to take it to another level and see where we end up. I’ve confused my self and I don’t know what to do pleas someone help me.
Responses to this article:
--- Friday, October 7, 2005 - ~* To Quisha *~
Answer by: Jodie
Hi,
I think you should take a little time out from the whole relationship arena... your emotions are all over the place and though you are seeking comfort and reassurance from these guys, neither is really delivering.
Tell this old flame that whilst you enjoy his company that you want to just be friends for now, if he's worth it he'll stick around. You need to clear your head and after a little while it will become clear who (if either) of them you'd like to pursue a relationship with.
Often you can't see the "wood for the trees", in which case you need to take a step back and find yourself again. I don't think you need the pressure of a relationship right now so some you-time is greatly in order.
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