To be honest, I don't quite know how many people in their 20's feel this way, but I am still in the closet as a bisexual. I'm not sure quite how to completely come out because it became a disaster when I started, thus I went all the way back in. Everyone thinks I'm straight, and I am hurting everyday living a lie [as ironic as it sounds, I hate lying with a passion].
I am not sure how college students feel differently than high school students. I started to come out to my friends once I was comfortable enough back then, yet everyone became revolted and uncomfortable, except my gay friend, and they treated me very differently - which really hurt me - , so I lied and said I wasn't, but rather that I was just confused for a month or so.
I feel that maybe one day I could tell my roommate one day because I only love her just as a friend. She seems to be very accepting because she loves shows that have strong gay themes, in addition her favorite cousin happens to be a lesbian.
However, before I can truly tell people about my true sexuality, I feel that I need to accept myself. It's been somewhat intricate because I've known about my sexuality since kindergarten, yet the way I was raised I was meant to take it as something filthy and sinful. I honestly don't think homosexuality or bisexuality is a sin, but there has been years of damage done regardless; not to mention how my high school friends were insolence towards myself. How can I help to feel content with my sexuality?
Furthermore, when would this be respectable to share with my boyfriend? I love him, however, I also don't want him to believe I may leave him for a woman [I am the type to marry a woman if I found 'the one.'], or ask if I could make out with another girl for the hell of it [I honestly don't think he would disrespect me like that, but I am not the person to kiss anyone either].
I suppose I am lost at what to do. I have prayed everyday for God to let me be straight, yet I am still the way I was born as. I know I am with a remarkable guy right now, yet that doesn't change how I feel about other women.
I am sorry if this is rather long, yet I pray that someone may have an answer for me! Thank you to all who read this! Bless -
Camryn
Responses to this article:
--- Monday, October 24, 2005 -
Answer by: Red_Roses
Question: Are you really bisexual, meaning, do you desire to have sex with other women, and are sexually attracted to other women -- or, do you feel that you may just be curious?
It's not uncommon that some women feel that they are bi-curious, so this is why I'm asking.
This is something that you need to find out yourself, on your own. You have a boyfriend at this point, do you feel that you want to experiment with other women to "find yourself", or are you content with being with your boyfriend, but at the same time vocalizing your sexual orientation? Or, do you feel the need to explore this sexuality with women, to truly find out if you really are, indeed, bisexual?
Again, if you truly feel that you are bisexual, then you need to come to terms with it, and accept yourself. The people who truly love you in life will accept you the way you are.
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