Title: Not high on her list...

By: 97749774

I have been in a relationship for over 3 years with a wonderful woman. She is caring, generous and sensitive and I love her to bits. She is a good bit older than me, Im 33, and has 3 kids. Receintly she has become a grandmother.

This doesent change the way I feel about her. What it does do is tie her down more. Her daughter and grand child live with her and her son so there isnt room for me to even stay overnight so she visits me 3 times a week, although we see each other every day.

My problem is that I get the feeling Im slipping to the bottom of he list of important people in her life. To me, she is top of my list but I feel I'm second from bottom on hers (herself being at the bottom). I know you might say I'm being selfish and stupid to think I should be more important to her than her kids but I'm not. I'd never expect her to give them up for me. The fact is that she herself complains about them. She says she has had enough childrearing and wont get caught to bring up her grandchild. She says she is sick of the responsability.

My questions are, is she only saying this to keep me happy, knowing how sensitive I am?

Am I fooling myself to think I am important to her and will one day be closer to the top of her list?

What should I do? Her answer to any debate is "leave if your not happy", should I?

I dont want to leave, I love her too much. The delimma is, I also love myself...

Any help with my problem would be greately appreciated. Thanking you...

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Wednesday, January 31, 2007 - Too giving
Answer by: gregg@loveisgreat.com