So i'm 19. And i've been with my boyfriend for 2 years. He moved 3000 miles away from home to come live with me and my family. We've been living here for just over 6 months and are now talking about buying a house together.
I feel like i want to marry him so bad. Every day thats all i think about. I just want to be engaged to him. Hes everything i want. Now the tricky part: weve talked about it before but he seems so terrified every time i bring it up. We fought about it for 3 hours a few days ago and he says he doesn't know if i'm the one.
Does that mean he doesn't love me? Should i stay with him? Or should i look for someone that'll be moe committed even tho that kills e to think of being with someone else. PLEASE HELP!!!!
Responses to this article:
--- Monday, February 5, 2007 - You might not think so, but he does....
Answer by: starfox_04
You are 19 years old. Sure, a lot of my classmates got married young (I'm only 21). A lot of growing up happens between the ages of 18 and 23, so I'm told and I can look back and see it already. Boys mature a lot slower than girls at our age. You might be fine with getting married at 19, you don't say how old he is, but I'm going to assume he's roughly your age. HE ISN'T READY. DON'T FORCE HIM TO BE OR HE WILL LEAVE.
Sure you've been dating for 2 years and he's living with you... which I think is an amazing amount of commitment right there, my boyfriend won't even live with me. You have a good thing going, so shut up about getting married. You have so many years ahead of you to make sure he is the one, so you don't make a mistake because you are young... don't ruin a good thing. Don't argue for 3 hours about it, just shut up. If he wants to marry you, he will. If not, he's not the one. Give it time, what's your hurry? They won't turn you away from a marriage license in 2 years, they aren't running out of them.
I bet he does love you. You can love someone without wanting to get married this second. Boys don't like talking about marriage, especially at age 19. Its a huge step, to some people its permanent, and it should be thought through very well and it takes time to make a choice if the person you love is THE ONE you want to be with for the rest of your life.
Think of it this way... you want to be engaged NOW. Why? Because you are afraid of losing him? If he moved 3000 miles to live with you, I doubt you are going to lose him anytime soon. So whats the rush? Calm down, stay with him, he loves you, stop talking about marriage, give it a few more years, grow up a little more. I don't know if you and him are going to college or whatnot, but perhaps in a few more years he will have a good enough job to buy you a better ring, while if you forced him into a guilt marriage by always crying about it you would have a pawn shop ring and a husband looking, and perhaps more, at other girls because you didn't give him a chance to grow up and experience life.
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