Title: He Scream Infedelities, I Scream "Notice Me"

By: millie

(sighs) Here comes a long entry-read if you are willing to help a girl in need-nolen volens.

Well, my name is Millie and I'm about to turn 15 in a month or so. Anywho, I entered highschool as a freshmen last year and was reunited with a middleschool friend I never got a chance to hang out with (she was also a freshmen). Being the freshmen we were, we headed to the Homecoming dance after a band competition. We were in our sweats, so we headed to her house (about 10 minutes away) and got ready over there. I had never went to her house or met her family, so all of what I saw was new to me. As soon as I finished getting dressed in my uni-strapped black dress and heels, I walked up the steps. Usually, when you walk up those steps, you'll see someone on the computer. I walked up, walked a few steps and saw someone sitting in the computer chair. It turns out it was her bro (he was a junior, ill call him edwin for now). I was astonished-he was handsome, but he had merely noticed me. So her sister took us to the dance...and all that jazz. When I got home, all I knew was that the only thing that had made me smile that day was him.

And throughout the year, I had liked him, but I didn't want to say anything to anyone, especially her-I wouldn't know how'd she act. So I had soon fell for another guy so I could forget him-little did I know what goes around comes around.

My friend had pulled me over one day in class from my other friend and she whispered to me, "She likes my brother." I didn't know what to say, so I just laughed telling her "good luck." I was really crushed about it, so I tried to forget about him and the guy I was supposively crushng on-boy was I wrong.

My other friend (the one who liked him too) was a little too...um, addicted I'd say. I think she stalked him or something, but she was too obsessive. Me and my friend had to listen to her talk about him every minute-I just kept wondering how far is too far. One day, she wrote to him saying that she liked him and whatsoever; he denied her. And his sister kept complaining to me that she had enough of my other friend stalking him and he was tired of it too. I don't know how, but they started blaming me for stalking-I had nothing to do with it. So on his site, he put a "friend's only" policy on it so she or any of his sister's stupid friends couldnt read it.

And being the good friend I was, I supported her at first, but she got too carried away. Thing was, her stalking made it easy for me to know him in an instance. He had once im'd me not knowing which friend I was and picked on me about spelling a lyric wrong on my profile-supposively, it annoyed him. I tried starting a conversation with him by telling him I was going to look through his profile, and I asked him about why he was really going to summerschool. I think he got angry at me, so he logged off. I met him coincidentally that same day when I headed to the school day for an event-he was leaving for a baseball game, but waited in the gym. I didn't want to talk to him knowing that he possibly knew it was me, so I just talked to his sis and my friend.

One day, my friend (the one that liked him) pulled me over and started talking to me (we too had developed a friendship during the year and she talked to me about him all the time). She had told me about him denying her and that she wanted to forget about him, so I tried helping her. She told me she liked another guy now and she was over "him". So I believed her. Next day, she kept talking about how she had forgotten about him and how she was hurt by what had happened. His siter kept telling me that she really didnt forget about him if she still talks about him, but soon, she did.

As for me, I had too gotten a website so he would see what I wrote and to talk to my other friends. I read what he wrote everyday (a journal). He had a "friend's only" policy, but if you checked everyday, you could see the recent entry. Everything he wrote had reminded me of myself, and how I really wanted to help him out-he was going through a tough time. Thing was, he liked the girl who lived a few houses down from me. I was angry, but I just kept thinking there was no chance for me with him.

What was in my mind:

1). He didn't want to talk to me cause I was his siter's friend

2). My friend stalked him

3). WE had an arguement

4).He stereotyped me by my ations

during that same month, I had gotten an email. i read it, and it was his older brother. I questioned it, he never met me before. It said he didn't know who I was, but he wished me good luck. I became friends with him instead, but I still liked edwin. So me and edwin's bro became friends and were on my friend list (along with the stalker friend), so i was basically friends with 2 ppl he did not like. I just thought, "how will I ever get to talk to him now"

Well since its now summer, I had more time to talk with edwin's brother, and his siter left for vacation til the beginning of school. Edwin's bro kept asking me to hng out wit him cuz I kept refusing becuz of my overprotective mom, but one day I told him I could if I snuck out of the house. So I snuck out with no one left at home, and went for some coffee and breakfast at McDonald's. This was the second time hhe saw me, but the first time talking alone. As I thought, he treated me like a kid (kind of) and our conversations sucked (because I didn't want to say anything stupid knowing he would tell Edwin. So we barely spoke, went to McDonald's and the dry cleaners, and he drove around for a bit around the two towns (we live in different towns, yes) and he finally drove me home. It was fun, but it went too quck. I headed back to my computer and was hoping Edwin had written in his journal (I don't talk to him, so I never im'd him or whatever). Later that night, I decided to talk to a new friend I had made during the summer and I was reading Edwin's journal. What I read shocked me-it wasn't about me or anything, but he had written about crying and the hatred he had against his bro and parents, and he spoke of pessimistic thoughts. I told my friend I had to write in the journal, after all these months that I've anticipated to do so). I mean, he needed someone at that time-the girl he liked wasn't in his mind anymore. So I wrote a comment saying that he wasn't anthing of the things he said and that those adversities he was suffering against would make him stronger; I wanted to make him feel better.

The next day, which was today, he thanked me-he sid he really "need that". I wrote a comment saying that I wished him luck. And I guess that I screwed up my chance in talking to him. I knew he would of im'd me or added me to his friend's list if someone were to say that, but he didn't. My real name or address was not posted on the comment-it had the same town as his, and a nickname of mine, but you would've never known it was me).

I just kept thinking, I screwed up my chance. I mean, he's never going to talk to me cuz of how he had stereotyped me and didn't give me a chance. He never got a chance to meet me, and already, he didn't like me. I was hoping that me sending a comment and making him feel better would of made him think better of me or something-possibly as a new frined, but nothing.

My friend (he one I talked to that night) said he would talk to me if he really was thankful-he was wrong. I have no clue why he won't talk to me now. I mean, i really love him, he's always been around, but he never paid attention to me. I want a chance with him

How can I convince him to talk to me? What should I do? There's more to this story, but what I typed was the basics of the story. PLEASE HELP!

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Thursday, August 5, 2004 -
Answer by: Sam

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Wednesday, July 14, 2004 - a little confused
Answer by: brielle